more of the story

I have had so many emails and phone calls and inquiries for more details of Gath's story. So while I have a moment between posting items on the auction, cleaning up messes, getting meals for my family, and other of my "normal duties", I will try to answer a few of these questions. Really it might save me some time in the long run so that I don't have to keep individually responding to these same questions.

Back in October, Garth noticed a growth/lump on his chest. He thought it odd, but wasn't too concerned. A few days later out of the blue showed Diana and said, "hey what do you think of this?" She was immediately on the phone making a doctor's appointment. (We all need people like that in our life.) So first doctor's appointment resulted in being sent for a mammogram. After the mammogram he was sent for a biopsy. The biopsy results came back positive for cancer cells and his breast cancer diagnosis was initially made the beginning of December. A mastectomy was scheduled for Monday morning, Dec. 21, 2009 at UMC. (Rereading what I just typed makes me feel like it was a clear cut simple process;it wasn't. We had to wait for appointments and payment arrangements to be made every step of the way.)


When he arrived that morning Garth was told by the doctor that after conferring with other doctors, they were questioning the original diagnosis. That was the first that we heard about IBC. We learned that it accounts for only 1-5% of all diagnosed breast cancer patients. It is nicknamed the "silent killer" because you are often at stage 3 before there are any signs or symptoms. It is rare, but the most aggressive form of breast cancer. Here is one of many websites that talk about this disease: http://www.ibcsupport.org/new.html if you want to read more for yourself. Instead of the mastectomy that was scheduled they told him they were going to do a bigger biopsy to confirm diagnosis--I will spare the details of that event--and then they sent him home to await the results.

The 21st until the 24th seemed a lot longer than three days even in the hustle and bustle of Christmas preparation. The morning of Christmas Eve we (Jason Abbott & three of his kids, Dave Knox & two of his kids, and Jon, I & our six kids) went to do the tunnels hike out by Lake Mead. While on this hike we learned the news that Garth has IBC. The tears didn't come immediately for any of us. We talked about all that we knew about the disease. We discussed new options for getting the money needed to treat this disease. We realized with gratitude how blessed we were that the doctor took the precaution to wait and do another biopsy. Unlike other forms of breast cancer the worst thing to do in this case is cut it out. He now needed chemotherapy then radiation followed by more chemotherapy. (We didn't know it at that time but soon found out that it would be, $35,000 for each treatment= grand total of $105,000 and that didn't include everything else along the way). We definitely had more questions than answers.

Tears came for me on the drive home from the hike. Before we made it home Garth called Jon and during their conversation Garth said and I quote, "h*** I don't want to be attending my own wake. I just want everyone to be happy and enjoy the day!" He said more during that conversation, but that is the part that stuck in my mind. And that is exactly what we did. We enjoyed Christmas Eve together as a family-- all 29 of us (plus a friend of Andrew's who didn't have anyone to be with that night). We ate good food (what Abbotts do best), sang Christmas carols, talked and laughed. It was a wonderful night in spite of the devastating news.

The most frustrating part of this experience has been time. Time doesn't stand still, freezing the cancer growth while we pursue all avenues to get necessary funding. We are pursing all avenues available. He has applied for help through the county social services. UMC no longer has a cancer treatment center. It closed last year for lack of funding. He contacted the Huntsman Center in Salt Lake City--on Monday he was told he was not accepted for treatment. We are working with the Nevada Cancer Institute. We have contacted the Susan G. Komen foundation--They don't give grants for individuals. They do have other ways to help, and we are working with them to see if Garth qualifies. There have been other websites and options that we are looking at too. In short, I'm sure that eventually some of these options will be able to help. Meanwhile his aggressive cancer is growing, and we want to be able to start treatment while we secure funding.
Hopefully this gives people a little better understanding about what we are up against, and why I (my sister Lynette was the one who actually pushed me in this direction ) chose to do this auction. I didn't ask Garth before I started (although I did make sure his kids were o.k. with it). I am a believer in the saying "it is easier to ask for forgiveness than permission" so I proceeded without asking him. Is he uncomfortable with all of this? Yes, of coarse he is. He doesn't want to burden anyone. At the same time he is humbled and grateful for this outpouring of love. All of the Abbott family has been so touched by the response from everyone. The donations of goods and services and money are so appreciated. Words are inadequate to express our gratitude to everyone. So we simply say, "Thank you".